Hi, my name is Sheryl and I've just joined this group, very late/early am. Couldn't sleep and wanted to look over your site Nicky and see what my sister posted. Couldn't find her so I cruised about and I am very much in awe as to what you are trying to do here. Thank you for the great time and effort in producing this project. I'm hoping I'm posting correctly my introduction here in the correct area.
I guess I have been on the spiritual path since around five years old when I used to pray for protection from the dark and the spirits or a spirit that visited me. I also had many dreams of being burned at the stake from the feet up and being in a white operating room on an operating table. I really didn't and still do not understand those dream experiences.
I was indoctrinated into the Catholic faith by my mother and went to a Catholic school until the end of my seventh grade, about eleven or twelve, when my parents divorced. My dad was an atheist, mathematician, and alcoholic. My parents met at Berkeley University. My mom was studying art.
I used to hear what I referred to then, "The Voice of God," talking to me as a kid, once when I was being harmful to a cat. The "Voice," beautiful and gentle, unlike my parents, said, "Sheryl, the cat doesn't like that," and I stopped the behavior immediately. My parents would have screamed, beaten me and shamed me, to where I might have never learned from the experience. But this voice in that one moment changed me by letting me see my behavior from the cat's perspective.
I've had some horrific experiences happen to me, one where I was being choked to death by an older girl, another where my sister and I were stuck on the railroad tracks in the backseat of my uncles car, with a train coming at us and he was laughing in order to abuse his wife, my auntie who was in the front seat. Another experience of running down into the basement of a neighbors house and being inundated by a swarm of termites crawling over me while I was paralyzed in fear screaming. None of these things were acknowledged and talked about in my family.
I've had the opportunity over the years to attend a church service at a Mormon church, Baptist church, Assemblies of God, etc. I've gone on my own and have been through a lot of psychological therapy, 12 step groups, self help books. Taken courses in deep listening techniques with a local spiritual teacher, by the way advised me that an abortion was ok since the growing baby body was only a "robot." Yes, I am a murderess, twice.
Got into the New Age movement and stayed with the Abraham teachings for a long time to where I created a wonderful series of paintings I call "The Bliss," series. I studied Edgar Cayce, the Toltek Agreements, done breathwork, and even attended a Landmark Forum seminar. I am a Reiki I, with symbols. I loved the symbols so much my teacher taught our group how to use some.
My sister introduced my to AJ and the seminars and I've been here since. Sometimes I do some natural love stuff through Christie Marie Sheldon, but it is so close to the divine love path, that I use her methods to access areas of my life I can talk to God about.
I now just talk to God. I visualize that I climb a highchair, like a child, and say the Great Prayer for Divine Love, until I feel my heart open up. I visualize God in both mom and dad form, reaching out to me as I reach out to them. I've set timers on my smart phone for every hour to just connect with them through my heart. I try to "Put God in all things first," and ask often, "Is there a better way to do _____."
I've even done this with silly card games on my ipad. I've won 44 times in a row by asking is there a better way to do this.
I am under no illusions as to where I am, I am still in the hells, and working on increasing my level of Love for myself and others. There are times when this comes so easily and naturally. But lately I've been very stressed out and have been reverting back to a more hateful self. I know I have to work on arrogance, indifference, self loathing, self hatred, anarchy, superiority, and other areas. God, through the Law of Attraction, is working on a big one for me, and I feel I am just not getting it. Clueless, because of the amount of bad stuff happening, I have lost the time to just sit down and, as my sister says, and "Dwell" on the feelings of all the loss of time, money, freedom, etc. that is happening to me right now.
I did feel a little apprehensive to join this forum and share this because of the bad feelings that are going on for me at the moment, that I thought that everyone would feel the anger coming off me. But as I write this now, some tears are showing up. This is good.
I want to become a more loving person; to myself and others. That is the goal.
I also have many questions. I have a scientific mind and discovered in all of this that I am actually kind of smart. I never thought that, just kind of average. I got A's in algebra, recently, and I'm having the desire to study physics, chemistry, biology, and more math. I want to understand fractal mathematics. Or be a channel for higher intelligence to bring ideas to this world. I had a dream recently of being in a city, it was daytime, I looked up at one of four tall buildings that had rounded spherical domes on the top, this one had what looked like one of those florescent light bulbs that twisted up into the sky and back down into the bulb part. It appeared to be a power plant of some type maybe getting energy from the sun.
I like what is going on in this forum. It feels more honest and I am, baby step, by baby step, becoming more truthful and open to sharing. I would love to hear of the actual experiences of receiving Gods Love into the body, from yourself or others, as I have had this happen twice since consciously being on this path. It used to happen in the past but I had no idea that it was called "Receiving God's Love." Also, is there a "Law of Allowing?" Where people just let you be who you are without trying to change you or shame you into fitting in.
I thank you for your gift of time and my apologies for this being so long worded. - Sheryl
Introducing myself
Re: Introducing myself
Hi Sheryl
Welcome to the forums.
Regarding your questions, what do you mean about God's Love entering the body? God's Love enters our soul so I am not sure if you meant this or whether you are curious to know what sensations happen in our physical body while we are receiving God's Love into our soul. One thing for sure is that when I have been lucky enough to receive it, it makes the grief I am experiencing much more intense as I start feeling the contrast between the error that has been in me and the love coming in.
One bit of confirmation that I have found is that once I have gone through a chunk of emotion, a beautiful feeling of love, peace, calm, joy etc remain and I've found it lasts for a day or two, sometimes even longer if I went through a big emotional release and remained connected with God for as long as possible. It is the BEST feeling ever and makes the pain you had to feel beforehand COMPLETELY worth it.
If you were receiving "nice" emotions from a spirit or groups of spirits, these feelings don't last and wear off EXTREMELY quickly. With God's Love, you can just tell there is real substance and an air of permanency to it and can feel it as such deep down. I feel in your question you aren't too sure about your own experiences and are wondering whether what you experienced was from God or from a spirit and are maybe looking for some confirmation. Only you yourself can determine the efficacy of your own experiences.
With regards to a "Law of Allowing" again I am not too sure what you mean. I think what you might be trying to express is similar to the Law of Free Will?
I have not heard Jesus mention a "Law of Allowing" in a video so I don't even have an intellectual awareness of such a law if it exists - I wouldn't rule it out although I do feel though that this question is driven by a fear you may have.
Hope that helps.
Nicky
Welcome to the forums.
Regarding your questions, what do you mean about God's Love entering the body? God's Love enters our soul so I am not sure if you meant this or whether you are curious to know what sensations happen in our physical body while we are receiving God's Love into our soul. One thing for sure is that when I have been lucky enough to receive it, it makes the grief I am experiencing much more intense as I start feeling the contrast between the error that has been in me and the love coming in.
One bit of confirmation that I have found is that once I have gone through a chunk of emotion, a beautiful feeling of love, peace, calm, joy etc remain and I've found it lasts for a day or two, sometimes even longer if I went through a big emotional release and remained connected with God for as long as possible. It is the BEST feeling ever and makes the pain you had to feel beforehand COMPLETELY worth it.
If you were receiving "nice" emotions from a spirit or groups of spirits, these feelings don't last and wear off EXTREMELY quickly. With God's Love, you can just tell there is real substance and an air of permanency to it and can feel it as such deep down. I feel in your question you aren't too sure about your own experiences and are wondering whether what you experienced was from God or from a spirit and are maybe looking for some confirmation. Only you yourself can determine the efficacy of your own experiences.
With regards to a "Law of Allowing" again I am not too sure what you mean. I think what you might be trying to express is similar to the Law of Free Will?
I have not heard Jesus mention a "Law of Allowing" in a video so I don't even have an intellectual awareness of such a law if it exists - I wouldn't rule it out although I do feel though that this question is driven by a fear you may have.
Hope that helps.
Nicky
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Re: Introducing myself
Hi Nicky,
In regards to feeling Gods Love enter my soul, it came through to my heart from out of nowhere, not the top of my head nor up my spine, and there was an expansive feeling of love there which at the same time brought tears to my eyes. Flowing tears.
The peaceful feelings you describe do last for a day or two, but that happens after a deep crying, grief session. And the next day everything goes better. Very harmonious, nothing bothers me. I asked because no one seemed to really discuss this on the other sites.
On the Law of Allowing, yes, there most likely is fear for me covered over in frustration in what I've heard termed "The Law of Allowing." It is related to free will, mine to others and others to mine. My frustration is mired in arrogance that I'm getting now as I write this, that some people should respect my choices as to how I want to spend my time. My arrogance is based in ego and I'm closing now to go dwell on this. It's arrogant of me to assume people should respect me. Aha.
Do you have a donations page set up?
In regards to feeling Gods Love enter my soul, it came through to my heart from out of nowhere, not the top of my head nor up my spine, and there was an expansive feeling of love there which at the same time brought tears to my eyes. Flowing tears.
The peaceful feelings you describe do last for a day or two, but that happens after a deep crying, grief session. And the next day everything goes better. Very harmonious, nothing bothers me. I asked because no one seemed to really discuss this on the other sites.
On the Law of Allowing, yes, there most likely is fear for me covered over in frustration in what I've heard termed "The Law of Allowing." It is related to free will, mine to others and others to mine. My frustration is mired in arrogance that I'm getting now as I write this, that some people should respect my choices as to how I want to spend my time. My arrogance is based in ego and I'm closing now to go dwell on this. It's arrogant of me to assume people should respect me. Aha.
Do you have a donations page set up?
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Re: Introducing myself
Hi Sheryl,
Nice to meet you. Nicky has a donations page on his main website: http://www.divinetruthhub.com/donations/
Arvarna
Nice to meet you. Nicky has a donations page on his main website: http://www.divinetruthhub.com/donations/
Arvarna
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