I wrote this up and then thought that actually it might be better to just briefly mention a couple of things in the posts coming up rather than this whole post. like Personal responsiblity, which could be another great topic for us to cover. And we could use this as an example.
I just had a feeling to hold this one as it might detract from the more important stuff with Rita....
Thanks
Eloisa
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http://forum.divinetruthhub.com/viewtop ... f=30&t=919
Hi Mike
There are a few things that you are doing which are unloving. It is always best to look at ourselves before we look at others.
While ever you are wanting something from your mum you are engaging addictively with her. There is an opportunity here for you to look at your addictions and what is happening for you.
You make a comment:
Mike you are being unloving to your mum which is a convenient way to get away from taking personal responsibility for your own feelings and actions. I am not defending your mother, merely addressing YOUR part in the interaction. Regardless of what she has or has not done, at this time you are blaming her and trying to manipulate others into thinking your mum is the ‘bad guy’ because she doesn’t do what you want her to do. This is also a way to avoid your own feelings of what has happened to you.After processing for quite a while today I immediately got into an altercation with my Mother upon her return home about me properly taking care of my sister's dog when they aren't home. It's an interesting law of attraction for me that tells me whenever I am in a heightened 'feeling state' it automatically triggers my parents fear and the smallest exposition of their behavior will escalate into an angry backlash. I have justified living here (at my Mom's) for a while because she seems to accept my beliefs and needing to process so long as I don't involve her.
You need to take some personal responsibility and look at the choices you are making. Right now you are living with your mum when you don’t have to be. You are old enough to have your own place and be supporting yourself instead. There is a reason you are choosing to be living with your mother and because you are if she has asked you to look after the dog in a certain way and not to involve her in your emotional processing then I would respect that because you are staying in HER house. If it was your house it would be different. She has been honest with you in wanting nothing to do with your beliefs and you need to ask why you are so upset about this? You can move out at any time.
I realise that as children we each have injuries that were created by our parents that harmed us. BUT at some point we need to stop blaming them and get on with healing and seeing the truth of what has happened to us and how us not taking personal responsibility creates more harm, both to ourselves and others.
God made it possible to heal without needing our parents to do so first, isn’t that a wonderful thing? I feel so.
You state that you are angry with your parents, good to be honest, but be aware of justifying your rage and living in it. In this example it feels like you are having a tantrum and wanting to rebel against your mum rather than feeling the real feelings. I suggest responsibly feeling your rage because if you don’t it is going to attract events that are going to be unpleasant and you are likely to be volatile and harmful acting out of your rage if you don’t feel it and find out what is underneath it. You did this when you attacked Rita who didn't agree or support your addiction to be one of the 14 (you acted out of your unhealed injury with you Mum and Dad towards Rita) and you chose to be violent with her instead of releasing your anger in a safe manner, which then causes you to harm others without justification. If you continue to choose to project your rage rather than feeling the causes of it there is a good chance you will harm yourself and others further. You can’t change others but you can change you. The question is do you want to? At the moment it feels like you want them to change and agree with you.
You say:
Mike you are being pretty arrogant in this comment. You are stating that you are better than your mother when you are actually doing the same thing to her at this moment - you are closed down to Truth of what you are doing and you are projecting at your mum. You are also trying to manipulate others by publicly bringing them into your emotional process on this issue. I suggest you are looking for commiseration and others to agree with you and ‘side against’ your mother.I am starting to realize that it is pretty unrealistic to really engage in this path fully in the midsts of someone so closed down to truth as there is this constant unspoken projection coming from them at all times.
God does not condone unloving treatment of anyone no matter what they have done. One of the Principles of Divine Truth, is to love as God Loves, both ourselves and others which is the whole point of doing everything we can to become at-one-with-God.
I would be asking ‘What would God do? 'How does God feel about this interaction? How does God feel about what I am doing? How does God feel about my Mother and what’s going on between us?
I suggest looking at the Relationship series FAQ’s.
Ethics and Morality talks
Law of Compensation, Forgiveness, Repentance and Prayer
Regardless of how your mother has treated you in the past, you are responsible for your own choices NOW and how you act and react. If you want to love you have an opportunity to do so here. You can feel your own feelings truthfully rather than projecting them upon others.
You also have an opportunity at this time to heal a lot of things with your mother. If you are serious about change you may want to contemplate the choices you are making and create a different space to live in if you are finding you cannot work through the issues you need to in your current environment.
Cheers Eloisa
PS there are other things in this post that will be addressed soon