Worry vs fear?

An illusion yet feels so real
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Mianoel
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Worry vs fear?

Post by Mianoel » Wed Nov 25, 2015 6:18 am

Hello,

What is the difference between worry and fear?

I have spent most of my life worrying, but it's a very stuck state. What are we actually doing when we worry?

Mia

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Re: Worry vs fear?

Post by Mianoel » Thu Nov 26, 2015 9:18 am

Here are a few more open questions:

- is worry when you try to take responsibility for things you can't (like the emotions of others), and feel we need to find a way to fix things?
- is worry a true indicator that we are not taking action? (I take most action out of worry, not desire, and that doesn't seem like much fun in the long run)
- is worry the result of believing in a punishing god?
- is worry the result of a lack of faith in self?
- is worry a sign that we are applying willpower and not will
- is worry a direct symptom of spirit attack?
- is worry a form of self punishment?
- is worry an addiction to control?
- is worry : living in fear instead of feeling fear?

What practical steps can we take to step out of this?

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Courtney
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Re: Worry vs fear?

Post by Courtney » Fri Nov 27, 2015 3:39 am

Hi Mia,

Worry is on the spectrum of fear, as is anxiety. In a similar way to how annoyance is on the anger spectrum, worry is on the fear spectrum. If we're worried about something, we're afraid of it. Have you seen some of the videos on fear? Both the regular Divine Truth youtube channel as well as the Divine Truth FAQ channel have some amazing videos on fear.

I personally have found that a lot of things I have been or am "worried about" are repeating themes, and sometimes even things I'm almost constantly worried about. What I have discovered is that a lot of the time the only reason I would use the word "worry" instead of "fear" or "terror" (or that it feels that way) is because when I'm engaged in a lot of addictions, it can feel like this mild "worry", but it's really the tip of an iceberg that is actually about pretty strong terror and fear. I suppose I'm bringing this up because sometimes the reason we don't see worry or anxiety as being an indicator of substantial fears because we're engaging various addictions (whether physical, emotional, substance, etc.) that prevent us from really feeling the truth that worry is all about fear.

Courtney

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Re: Worry vs fear?

Post by Eloisa » Fri Nov 27, 2015 5:37 am

Hi Mia

I have worried a lot and I still worry at times. I agree it feels like a 'stuck state' and it also ends up being really exhausting and feels terrible.

What I notice is that I worry often to avoid feeling the real feelings that are within me on any given situation/subject. These are usually feelings of fear - for me anyway.
Worry gives me an ‘out’, an excuse to do nothing and stay ‘worried’ rather than making decisions or doing things. It allows me to tell myself untruths in order to ‘get away’ from feeling my fears.

I have found taking actions out of worry, for me personally is about avoiding what I fear, or a desire to live in my fear/s rather than feeling them. So for example if you are worried something ‘might’ happen and you do it because of that rather than because you truly desire to, I feel this is a fear based action.

I have found that worry has been used against me by others - to manipulate me and also that I use it on myself to avoid actually taking action on certain issues and feeling how I really feel. Worry has felt 'safer' even though this is not actually true from God's perspective. So for example: people/spirits have projected certain feelings at me or suggested stuff and I get so worried that I then do nothing, or I do what they desire or what they approve of instead of feeling about what I really desire to do, in this place I give up Love, Truth and ethics. (This highlights my addiction to others approval and how much I care about what others think and feel about me.) Or I use worry to avoid actually doing anything. I notice often when I actually do the thing I was worrying about - e.g. say how I really feel, or take actions on the issue that the worry disappears.

When I was in denial of this addiction (above) my worry in these types of situations was felt so huge. Now, if I notice this happening, I reflect (while worrying, smile) and often I will get back to realising, ‘oh yes, here is that feeling again that this person is going to get angry and attack me and I feel bad and that I have to fix it - make them not angry at me’ (for example) and then I notice that sometimes I feel even more worried, so I tell myself God’s Truth: ‘you are not responsible for others emotions, if they are angry that is their choice and not your fault. They are choosing to attack you and that is actually unloving’, this eases the worry somewhat, and allows me to notice other feelings within me (in the above example my fear about being attacked).

I think that worry can stem from a lot of different things, but I feel it is mostly a strategy we use to avoid feeling our fears and real feelings.

I would suggest next time you are worried to make some time and reflect upon what you are really worried about. If you do this as it is happening you are more likely to feel about what the worry is about.

I suggest experimenting with the feeling.
  • Notice when it comes up: is it with certain people? Who? What do you feel from them? How do you feel in their company? etc And/Or does it come up in certain situations? If so, where, when, what is going on, etc, how do you feel about these situations?

    What is the worry about and how do you feel about it?

    Be really truthful with yourself (I often talk out loud to God and myself, hearing it said aloud often times help me to connect with the feelings I have).

    Get really specific with yourself about what exactly it is you are worried about. Telling ourselves the truth and being really, really specific about the fear that we have is amazingly helpful! Naming it specifically and in detail rather than leaving it general is really important.

    Feel how you feel. This will help the most.

    Ask yourself ‘What is God’s Truth on this situation’ feel the difference between your truth and God’s - this is an emotional experience (if you are not sure maybe start with basic ethics, or just asking yourself ‘do I really want to do this or am I doing it because I am afraid of something? If I am afraid, what is it about?)

    Pray and observe the Law of attraction.
I suggest worry is probably masking a fear (or fears) of something and you are more comfortable with worrying than feeling what you feel/fear, if you allow yourself to really feel about it, you will find out pretty fast. If you find it hard to feel, begin by observing the Law of Attraction and notice what is going on, you will need to feel to make the soul change, but I have often begun intellectually and I feel it can be helpful first step to opening up to the feelings.

I have found that worry is not a great place to make decisions from.

Worry is a good indicator that something is going on and this is an opportunity to find out what it is. Once you know what it is you are worried about - the fear - then you have the opportunity to feel about it and heal it for real - this is the exciting bit! What we can’t see, deny and don’t want to know about we have no chance of changing or healing.

I wish you all the best with the experiment and finding out what is under that worry!

Love

Eloisa

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Re: Worry vs fear?

Post by Amanda Stracey » Fri Nov 27, 2015 9:43 am

Hi Mia

My experience ( or really my experience of resisting fear) is that it feels very powerless and unsafe being afraid so I feel worrying for me is a compulsion or addiction to help control and manage feelings of fear. It obviously feels less crappy to worry worry worry than actually feel the fear of being ridiculed or shamed or harmed or attacked or humiliated or ( pick your own!) by speaking up or just saying how we feel or what we believe or our current opinion. So for me it's a choice or preference that feels automatic not really like a choice even that I feel has more power but as Eloisa has said - it's on the road to nowhere ( it doesn't solve anything) so in reality or from God's perspective I'm feeling it's a degradation because as I engage it I'm telling myself every time that I can't handle fear I can't handle fear - I need to worry to get rid of that fear but the cycle never ends. It's like never pulling the splinter out and actively ignoring the splinter that's festering away.

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Re: Worry vs fear?

Post by Amanda Stracey » Fri Nov 27, 2015 10:07 am

Hi again Mia

Just to be a bit clearer about practical steps

Realise that I am making the choice to worry, it is not inevitable. Realise I must prefer worrying to feeling the feelings. I would listen and read up as much as I could about addictions and pray or long for guidance or inspiration on that.

Realise that worrying performs a function - controlling and managing feelings I don't want to feel. Pray and write about what these underlying feelings might be. I've found when I've written things down the fears and some sadness can start to come up then more easily. Also saying things out loud to yourself - hearing them aloud is a bit shocking sometimes - is that what I really believe/feel!

Look at all the problems you can think of of how worrying affects your body and other people around you - people living with you. The costs of worrying I suppose and does it ever really solve anything. The talks on processing addictions I've found very useful recently. They are from 2010 and in the Human Soul playlist on YouTube.

As I have big problems/issues with time/pressure and rebellion/resistance that's usually as far as I let myself go in the process but challenging addictions is covered in almost every video presentation I've listened to on the D T channel so there is loads of practical help available on the emotional part of the process.

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Re: Worry vs fear?

Post by Eva » Fri Nov 27, 2015 10:21 am

Hi Mia and Eloisa,
I would like to add some of my own experience with worry. I feel it is true that worry is an addictive state to escape deeper emotions of fear. Now when writing this I can feel fear growing within me - about writing on the forum and exposing myself - this is a quite physical feeling with heat in my stomach, heartbeats and tinglings in my left cheek.

For me worry has been more of an intellectual place, something that is going on in my mind and fantasy and does not connect with my belly or the rest of my body. So whenever I find myself worrying, which for me means thinking about something that worrys me - if I then let go of the thinking mechanism and focus on the ongoing sensations in my body I feel that I immediately connect to my fear. The result is that very soon the whole thing I was thinking and worrying about is gone, forgotten and I can handle any practical situation in a much more practical, down-to-earth way.

I remember having heard Jesus say that you can use your fantasy as a tool to stir up some fear, and this is what has lead me into handling my worry this way. Thoughts about scary things (for example: I will be fooled by someone, my money won't be sufficient and so on) can get hold of me in the middle of the night and switch my worry on. When I become aware of what is going on I sometimes put more "wood on the fire" with my fantasy, and then let go of the thoughts and focus on the sensations and emotions within my body. This can be almost a pleasureable experience, a feeling of bathing in the bodily reactions of fear. When it is done to its full extent relaxation comes, and often I wake up from sleep hours later - not having noticed that it all ended.

This has helped me a lot to go from worry to fear. I would love to hear about your experiences if you have tried or will try it!

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Re: Worry vs fear?

Post by Nicky » Fri Nov 27, 2015 11:01 am

Hi

I have moved this topic into the "Fear & Terror" section of the forum as I felt this was most appropriate considering the nature of the thread.

Mia, this is the second occasion where I have moved your thread from the "Assistance" section of the forum (the first being an addiction for approval thread) to a place I felt was more specific to the emotions you were discussing. If you analyse your posts here, you are not really asking for direct personal help. It's more of a general query about fear to better your understanding - which is completely fine, it's just that there are other places on the forum where it would have been best to start the topic.

I'd also like to add that being more specific about things, particularly our emotions is really important otherwise without that, we will find it pretty difficult to process through them as we are not fully connecting with ourselves. I feel you posting this thread in the "Assistance" section of the forum was actually partly due to wanting to distance yourself from your own fear at an emotional level.

Thanks
Nicky

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Re: Worry vs fear?

Post by Elvira » Mon Nov 30, 2015 1:37 am

Hey Eloisa,
I worry A LOT also (still more present tense for me). Thank you for all your suggestions, I really appreciated your 'thinking out loud' for us. I often get so caught up I just don't think to apply logical questioning like that.
All my best Elvira

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Re: Worry vs fear?

Post by Mianoel » Tue Dec 08, 2015 4:24 pm

Thank you to all (in advance),

I will be reading and re-reading as i let this gel and experiment.
I will post about any successes when i will have them,

Nicki, spot on, thanks,

all the best for now,

Mia

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